If you were tested on your parenting skills, would you pass?

FRIDAY, MARCH 30: If a two-part parental examination were given to determine your track record on raising your child and your child’s behaviour, conduct, and performance, what would your grades be?

Or what grade would you give to a mother or father you know who is charged with the responsibility of raising children?

While we’ve often heard it said that there is no manual to teach parents the exact solutions to matters that will arise during child rearing, there comes a time when all adults must evaluate their parenting skills and make the necessary improvements and adjustments while being proud of the things they are doing successfully.

Children must never be left to raise themselves with all the freedoms they believe they are entitled to.

What is it that parents do that causes their son or daughter to grow up to be well-behaved, well-mannered, and able to produce good results in school?

What has the parent taught when the child exhibits sensitivity to the needs of others and a genuine kindness? What has gone wrong when offspring are back talking, showing disrespect to parents and authority, vandalizing material things, lying, and failing in school? Why don’t the parents of these children seek support — or are they in denial or oblivious to the actions of their children?

Does the fact that we live in a highly judgmental community cause parents to keep a tight lid on cries for help?

Or does the veil of shame and embarrassment cover a parent whose child is in trouble because perhaps it’s a case of the proverbial apple not falling too far from the tree?

Poor behaviour always seems to be justified by extrinsic events going on or caught up in the on-going arguments among some over the exact definition of right or wrong. These excuses must stop!

No matter the stage of parenting one might be at, one thing is for certain: the children we bring into this world need our time and our love — even when we can’t seem to find either for ourselves.

It’s a difficult job indeed but it’s the price one pays for making the choice to bring a life into this world. 

There are often long debates held among friends and even social media as to which sex seems to be pulling more of the parental weight than others. While an uneven balance is definitely unfair to the child, I believe it is incumbent on the more responsible parent to make the necessary arrangements to make sure their child is not being deprived of the things that will help mould the child into a well-adjusted and productive citizen. After all, as the old cliché goes, the children didn’t ask to come here.

On the next Generations radio show, let’s discuss the hard work involved in raising children.

I’d also love to hear from parents who are doing some positive and productive things with their children so that perhaps other listening parents can be empowered to make the necessary changes in their parenting style.

• Shawnette Somner is the host of Generations, which airs on DeFontes’ Broadcasting Company every Monday 7.30pm-9pm. Generations have moved from 1450AM Gold to MIX106 FM.  Call in live during the show on 295-1061. Please note the e-mail address has changed. Send comments and show ideas to the new e-mail address [email protected]